About Me

Hi! Welcome to Restart. I'm Brenda and I live in The South. I'm just a lady that loves her family and sharing my life.That life has made a major change after 29 years of being wife and Nana. Now I live for me. I have dreams that I had let die and today I must live them. God has blessed me with a second chance at life and I desire to live it to the fullest.I am into eating healthy,exercise,running,hiking and bike riding. If it means staying in shape and feeling good I am all for it ....other things I enjoy or cooking, decorating,thrifting,travel and walking where history took place.


Sunday, June 22, 2014

Knowing our hearts desire...

Today has been a very different day in my life. I woke up this morning reading so many post about marriage,relationships and divorce. It has really burdened my heart to see how we have lost what and how God designed us. I don't understand if all the failure comes from not putting God first or if we have gotten so numb to the roll we are given.
I am a product of a failed marriage and divorce. That maybe the reason the burden is so strong because I hate to see the enemy win. My divorce as many do came from a spouse that made a choice and I had to deal with it. Marriage takes two strong people working together and having the same desire. After my divorce as God helped me to over come and gain knowledge I realized the desire I had a young girl never changed. Being raised in a home where the love between my parents was so strong I learned what God meant when he gave us a map. The only way a marriage can and will work is if we take that map and follow it. Giving up should not be a choice we take lightly. Maybe because we live in a fast paced life where we want it and get it know people take that to a relationship.
I am so thankful each day for the parents I had and the devotion they had. I watched my mom live on dialysis for ten years. Did my dad ever give up on her when it got rough? No he took a vow and he took care of my mom until she passed away. A perfect picture of what God means when he says becoming one.
I ask God many times after my divorce why? All I ever desired was a beautiful,happy family. God showed me that even though he has designed the marriage union he allows man to make choices. It was also at this moment that I was reminded of what the enemy means for bad God will use to his good. In the four years following my divorce I have learned alot. I know it is Gods will that I use my testimony and knowledge to help others. I in know way consider myself perfect,but I am very willing and I know where my burden is.
Has my desire changed from the young innocent girl in the photo ..not one bit. I still and always will believe in God and his plan for woman and man. I will always strive to be as virtuous as I can be and to do my part.
I believe if we search out what God tells us is our role and give it our best marriage and relations can only grow.I am including a few scriptures and words that I think I need to share. I would also recommend if you your marriage is going through difficult times books by Stormy Omartian "Power of a praying wife and Power of a praying husband.
Women...Be a helper to your husband.  While all of us are called to be helpers to others, the Bible places a special emphasis on this responsibility for wives. Genesis tells us that God realized it wasn't good for man to be alone, and that He decided to make a "helper suitable for him" (Gen. 2:18). It is interesting to note that the Hebrew meaning of the word helper in this passage is found hereafter in the Bible to refer only to God as He helps us. The fact that this same word is applied to a wife signifies that we women have been given tremendous power for good in our husbands' lives. God has designed wives to help their husbands become all that God intends for them to be.
 Respect your husband. In Ephesians 5:33, Paul says, " … the wife must respect her husband." When you respect your husband you reverence him, notice him, regard him, honor him, prefer him, and esteem him. It means valuing his opinion, admiring his wisdom and character, appreciating his commitment to you, and considering his needs and values.
Men.... Be a leader. The Scriptures provide a clear organizational structure for a marriage. Following are a couple of typical Scriptures:
But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ
(1 Corinthians 11:3). Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body
 Love your wife unconditionally. Ephesians 5:25 reads, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her." Your unconditional acceptance of your wife is not based upon her performance, but on her worth as God's gift to you. If you want to love your wife unconditionally, always be sure her emotional tank is full. One of the best ways to do that is to affirm her constantly. Let her know verbally that you value her, respect her, and love her. I have discovered that I simply cannot do that enough.There is no question that words communicate love, but so do actions. You need to do both. As the Apostle John wrote in one of his letters: "let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth" (1 John 3:18). One of the missing ingredients in male leadership in homes is sacrificial action. When was the last time you gave up something for your wife—something you genuinely valued, like your golf game, a fishing trip, or your hobby? Sometimes you need to give up something you enjoy so your wife can have a break and see your love for her.
Serve your wife. According to the New Testament, being head of your wife does not mean being her master, but her servant. Again, Christ is our model for this type of leadership. Jesus did not just talk about serving; He demonstrated it when he washed His disciples' feet (John 13:1-17). Christ, the Head of the Church, took on the very nature of a servant when He was made in human likeness (Philippians 2:7).
One of the best ways to serve your wife is to understand her needs and try to meet them. Do you know what your wife's top three needs are right now? If she is a young mother, she has a certain set of basic needs. If your children are grown and gone and you are in the empty nest, your wife has a different set of needs that you should try to meet. What is she worried about? What troubles her? What type of pressure does she feel? Learn the answers to questions like that, and then do what you can to reduce her worries, her troubles, her pressures.

Friday, June 20, 2014

Life is like a garden....

    First off let me apologize to my readers for taking off so long. I took a much needed break and vacation.

Life is like a garden....

I was sitting here this morning having my coffee and I started to think about this. I say think about it,but that is one way God shares with me. During the day I couldn't get it off my mind and that usually means it is time to write.
What are some very important things about a garden? A few that come to my mind are the soil, the water, what type seeds we plant, fertilizer, grass, sunlight,pest. 

You can take two exact plots of soil close together and have two different people plant the same exact seed and the garden will not be the same.

Think about your life for a minute. What type soil are you planting in? Is it rich, does it have the nutrients it needs, do you cultivate it like you should? Or is it dry, hard and lacking any nutrients to help it grow? It all comes down to this if we are not sewing in rich soil you can take the most expensive seeds and they will end up doing nothing.

Now consider the water for a moment...what if we have beautiful rows of soil and the garden has started to produce and is doing great,but we get no rain. What starts to happen? What was once beautiful and producing dries up.  We get a water hose,but it will only reach a few rows of the garden...now what? The rows that are receiving water will be pretty while the others wither and die.

What about the seeds...If you have had the same old seeds in a bag for years and then you had the same seed that you just ran down to the store and bought fresh. Which seed do you think will produce the best product? I would say the new fresh seed the one that new.

What about fertilizer? Anyone that has ever had a garden or planted flowers understands how important it is to have good fertilizer. Each plant needs to be fed. Consider the idea of two rows of corn. One you decide to add fertilizer and the other you don't. The one that has been fed will grow faster,prettier and produce much better than the one that is lacking.

Sunlight...this is a very important part of how a garden will grow. There are some plants that grow better when they get lots of heat and sunlight. It reminds me of the peas we have planted. They love the hot sunlight. I went out in the garden the other morning and our peas where starting to get tiny pods. I missed going for a few days due to the hot, humid days and the next time I looked we had peas.

The last thing I think about is the pest. There is nothing that upsets me more than to have a beautiful green plant and find the bugs have eaten it up or to open a ear of corn and find a nasty worm inside living off my corn.

Each one of us when we are born are like a beautiful garden. We are made and designed with much work and a plan to produce wonderful things.
As we start to mature in life there are many things that come to destroy us.
Somethings that happen in our life we can not change,but many we can. No matter the hurt,pain and storms that come our way we must decide to thrive.
Just like the garden we have to be sure our soil is rich and full of life. Add the fertilizer so we can grow to become what we have been called to become. Make sure the seeds we plant into our life are fresh. Make sure that if we desire something we plant the right seed to produce that. You can't plant a corn seed if you desire to grow a melon.In life if we plant bad seed we will get bad fruit.
We must be very careful that the things in life that come to over take and choke back the life are plucked out. It only takes a moment to be thriving when something can come into your life . It can grow up around you so fast that you can't see it is choking the life from you until it is to late. Pluck out the things that steal your life.
Then we must be sure the to add light. There is no life in darkness. There is so much darkness in the world around us.We have to decide what and who we allow in our life. Do they or the things we partake in bring light?
And last but sure not least are the pest. We have an enemy he he desire nothing more than to destroy us. To eat us alive leaving holes in our life that cause us to wither and die.
How is your garden growing? Is it hard,dry and empty or lush,green and thriving? Is it producing what you desire or is it on the verge of death?
Today you can decide and change somethings in this garden we call life.